Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
