So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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