You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize