??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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