i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
