Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
So here I am, sexting at work.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize