OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Randomize