Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
