So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
