i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
they need to just BURY HIM!
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
