I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
