It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
