i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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