Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize