Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
