to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
