Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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