If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
