some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
