I hate your face
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
