dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
