have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
