Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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