i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
