i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize