This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
