He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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