I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
