I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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