You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I don't think brook has ever known best
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
