White coat. Heels.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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