Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
