The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I think people are normalizing furries
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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