There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
