Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
