i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
