Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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