somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
