Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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