Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
