Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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