: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You can't special order awesome
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize