ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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