at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
