Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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