If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
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