dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
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