His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
