shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize