strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
